How else would I have answered? If I was, indeed, doing the work of Satan, I would surely have lied and still told him “No!” The whole situation was just so ridiculous.

Why did this man, so afraid that I might be Satan in disguise waiting to pounce on him and snatch his soul, come to visit me?

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Cancer

At the time, I was active as a macrobiotic counsellor. I was giving dietary advice plus “way of life suggestions” to help people with cancer and other serious illnesses.

This man’s mother had cancer and he had brought her to see me, along with his brother. Later, I found out that it was actually his brother’s idea to consult me. He was reluctant at first. He had thought - and, no doubt, prayed - about it for more than two weeks before he finally agreed to come.

I found this out mid-way through the consultation, when the fundamentalist left the room to go to the toilet. The moment he stepped out of hearing range, his mother began to talk about him, his behaviour, his attitude, his fears...

She related how, if her son were to buy a house, he had to make sure that his neighbours were not Buddhists, Taoists or Hindus. He also had to make sure that, along the way from his home to the office, he would not have to pass by any Chinese or Indian temples.

Well, what if his neighbour decides to sell the house to a Buddhist, Taoist or Hindu? What if his company relocates? What if some non-Christian group decides to build a temple midway between his home and office?

I did not have the time to ask these and other questions that immediately popped to mind. Because the mother, who is not Christian, had so many things to say about her Christian son. I cannot remember them all, except for this one more:

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Spirit

She said her son would not drive along Serangoon Road, the part of Singapore also known as “Little India”, lest the spirit of some Hindu gods should enter his body.

I felt futile giving the mother a dietary consultation. What's the point of advising her what to eat, what not to eat, when it was so clear (to me) that her upset with her son was a major contributing factor to her illness?

I have to choose my words carefully as I write this.

It was not her son that contributed to her illness, but her upset with him. And, a complex disease like cancer is never caused by just one factor, be it poor diet or emotional upset or whatever. There are always many contributing factors.

But a situation like this is quite clear. Firstly, the man’s behaviour and attitudes were quite different from the norm - not right or wrong, just different. So it was only natural that his mother could not accept them.

She could have been equally upset if her son was gay, or if he wanted to marry a woman of a different race. Whatever. There are just so many reasons for parents to be upset with their children, for people to be upset with one another.

Secondly, the degree of the mother’s upset was obviously very great for her to outpour her woes - at the slightest opportunity - to a virtual stranger who she had just met a few minutes earlier.

I felt sorry for the mother because I saw little hope for her recovery and healing.

All of us must die one day and, in that sense, it would not have been such a tragic event if she died from not having recovered from cancer.

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Tragedy

The real tragedy is to die an unhappy death. For the mother to avoid this, one of two things had to happen: either her son changes his fundamentalist Christian approach to life, or she changes her feelings about him.

Both options seemed highly unlikely, although the second is probably the easier. Ultimately, this is what healing is all about - accepting the people in our lives, accepting our life situation, not being upset, being happy.

The mother had come to me for help. I could not help. I was not in a capacity to advise her on how she should react towards her son.

I wished I could have helped her fundamentalist Christian son as well. I also felt sorry for him.

I had met fundamentalist Christians before, I had read (sections of) books written by fundamentalist Christians. But never before had I come across someone so filled with so much fear.

Life must be tough when it is so fear-filled.

Did his church make him this way? Or did he join this church because he already felt this way? Because he needed to seek refuge from his fears? Are his fellow church members like him? Equally fear-filled? Or is he an exception?

Perhaps I should visit his church to find out. I am not sufficiently curious. But I must admit, I dare not!